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After hours of clock watching, talking shit with the Chef and serving the very occasional customer. It was finishing time. I raced around cleaning up and closing the pub down. It was only as I was letting the Chef out the door I realised I had not seen Jacqui in a few hours. I went behind the bar again and through the door to the back rooms and her office.I knocked on the door and she told me to come in. The office was a glorified, adapted storage room, with a bar table as a desk and a crazy-old looking PC, some boxes of files and the office chair Jacqui was sat in. Today there was also a half-drunk bottle of wine and a glass. Jacqui didn't look happy.“Hey, Jacqui. We're all finished up, I was about to head off.. You OK?” I asked.She looked up at me, fuck she had sexy eyes, pale blue.“I'm alright, doll” she said, unconvincingly in her Glaswegian accent, softer than her usual brash tones. “Come on” I said, moving round and leaning against her table desk “What's up?” She took another. Yet here I was, my mind wandering again, trying vainly to understand what it was about you that kept me irevocably tied to you as a boat tied to a dock.I decided quite quickly to call and book a flight to Boston. I'd put in for a week off. I decided not to tell you of my impending visit. It was not like me to "sneak" up on you for I prided myself on privacy for myself as well as for others. I just felt that if I told you ahead of time and I got scared and backed out you'd be devastated and therefore so would I. I did not want to hurt you anymore than I already had.When my plane had reached an altitude where we could loosen our seatbelts I quickly unhooked myself and stood up stretching. I tend to do that when I'm nervous about something. And indeed, I had reason to be nervous. You had pleaded with me for several years to meet you. We had a few good opportunities to do that. But something always held me back. Of course, your being married didnt help. We fell in love so easily, you and.
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